Flaky and buttery and delicious.

YOU’RE WELCOME, WORLD! Paleo pumpkin muffins

Flaky and buttery and delicious.
Flaky and buttery and delicious.

Sometimes I get frustrated. Sometimes I get frustrated when people want to go meatless and then eat a Boca burger. Why? Because, in my old age, I have become one of those people who believes that if you’re gonna do it, then do it—don’t mess around and eat some processed meatless “chicken” nuggets or “ribs” when the “real” version of those foods are the things you’re supposed to avoid. Really, why eat fake meat when you’re opposed to eating the real stuff?

Before you slam me, just know that I’ve been guilty of this once in a while. Black bean burgers? Tasty as crap. Morningstar “sausage”? Tasty as crap. It’s true.

I’m also guilty of doing the same thing on paleo. Because paleo is all about eating like our bodies were evolved to—like our paleolithic (cavemen) ancestors. (As an anthropologist, how much do I dig this? Like, super.) So, you know, meats and more meats and moar meats, some eggs, and lots and lots of vegetables. For the most part, I am totally complacent with my sauteed broccoli, baked chicken, and almonds. But sometimes you want something else. Something…grainy. Is this how a vegetarian or vegan feels when they eat veggie burgers or seitan medallions?

Anyway, so today, I am deviating from the paleo norm. Yup, this recipe is a grainy imitation. It’s not meant to be eaten every day, but it sure is tasty if you’re craving something cakey and delicious but don’t want to sacrifice your paleo nutrition.

So delicious, you don't even know.
So delicious, you dont even know.

I give you PUMPKIN MUFFINS (generously introduced to me by my friend Mikey!). I shit you not–these are some of the tastiest and most authentic baked goods that I have ever had on paleo. Really. They have been described to me as moist and buttery and I swear to god that Kevin and Leb fought over the last one I gave them. Someone actually looked at me like I was nuts when I said it contained coconut flour, because coconut flour gets a bad rap for making baked goods really dry and icky. NOT SO with these! Try them. Seriously. You’ll see.

Mikey’s Pumpkin Muffins

1/2 cup coconut flour (I use Bob’s Red Mill organic)
1 tsp ground cinnamon
1/2 tsp ground nutmeg
2 tsp pumpkin pie spice (OR 1/2 tsp ground cloves)
1/2 tsp baking soda
1/2 tsp table salt
1/2 cup(s) canned pumpkin
6 eggs
4 tbsp cold-pressed coconut oil, melted
1/3 cup maple syrup
1 tsp vanilla extract
1/4 cup walnut halves (optional)
1/4 cup dark chocolate pieces (optional)

Whisk in one egg at a time to the pumpkin puree.
Whisk in one egg at a time to the pumpkin puree.
After adding JUST 1/2 cup of coconut flour!
After adding JUST 1/2 cup of coconut flour!
Fill those cups!
Fill those cups!

Preheat oven to 350 degrees.

Mix dry stuff together in one bowl. Put pumpkin in another, add one egg and beat at a time, then the other wet ingredients.

Add dry to wet, mix until mostly incorporated but allow a few small lumps. Fold in nuts and/or chocolate or whatever else you wish to add.

Fill muffin cups 2/3 full of batter (about two small scoops if you have a portioner thinger). Bake for 18-22 minutes, until lightly brown on top and pass the clean toothpick test. Cool on a wire rack.

Because of the high egg content, I recommend storing these bad boys in the fridge if you’re going to have them for a few days (like that would happen anyway!). Just be sure to either warm up the muffins or let them return to room temperature before consuming.


This recipe makes 12 muffins.

For my WW friends, one muffin WITH walnuts is 4 p+.


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Exuberant photographer, artist, writer, designer, wannabe chef, and Crossfitter.

20 thoughts on “YOU’RE WELCOME, WORLD! Paleo pumpkin muffins”

  1. So I made these and they were great. I thought I would add my substitutions in case anyone is interested. Used pecans, which are really yummy, though probably not as healthy as walnuts. Could not justify all of the carbs and sugar in maple syrup so I did 1/4 cup almond milk and 1/4 cup stevia. I know, I know. I’ve gone paleo, I should stop thinking about calories and carbs…
    One more thing, so these were really great when they first came out of the oven in the evening but then the day after (storing them in the fridge) they were sort of chalky and weird. However, I’m really glad I didn’t throw them out because after they got moist from the condensation of being in a plastic bag for a couple days, they were really good again.
    Thanks for the recipe!

    1. Thanks for the tips, Lauren, and glad you liked them! I did notice the chalky weirdness of them being in the fridge, but that seemed to go away when (a) I warmed them up in the nukerator, or (b) let them come back to room temperature. They did go pretty rank when left in a normal, non-refrigerated container for more than a week, which is why I suggested it.

      How did they taste with Stevia? Now I’m curious! I’m being really careful about portion control with Paleo, since it seems like a lot of people I know have issues with that, so as long as I watch myself, I’m not too worried about the sugar in the syrup. All in moderation!

    2. I’m not sure why Paleo means you should stop thinking about carbs. From everything I’ve read, I think there are foods that are protective, and they’re pretty much all Paleo (no, I don’t think hearthealthywholegrains are protective, though dairy sometimes is), and if you eat enough of them your body can handle more dietary insults, as long as you’re not too far gone metabolically. But you can only take so many insults. Even the traditional populations Weston Price studied did not all have the same rate of dental decay. The bread-eating Swiss traditionals had the greatest number of cavities (though still far lower than their counterparts down the mountain in the city), while the pretty-much-carnivorous Inuit had the fewest.

      I know it’s trendy now to suggest that Paleo folk can eat all the honey and maple syrup and rice and potatoes they want because they’re eating Paleo, but trendy doesn’t make it true.

      That said, I’m not sure because I would need to look at the sugar breakdown on the USDA database, but I *think* maple syrup is a healthier choice than agave, at least.

    1. I mean you could, but I can’t imagine them tasting very good without the maple syrup. Also, my understanding of Paleo is that foods like these, with coconut flour, etc., should really be looked at as a treat and not a staple.

  2. If you’re not worried about Paleo and just want a yummy GF muffin, is there any reason not to sub rice flour for the coconut flour? Its what I have on hand and don’t really want to buy several different GF flours. Thanks! These sound so good.

    1. I’ve never used rice flour, but I can’t imagine why not. The only thing is, coconut flour absorbs liquid like a mofo, so you don’t need much in the recipe to hold it together (and you can’t use too much otherwise it’ll dry out the muffins). You’d want to look into equivalents for the best results.

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